Drivel and Nonsense

Lemon Chicken Francese

2011-12-18T14:20:00.005-07:00

Sometimes, when Ron is very lucky, I make dinner that isn't terrifying.

Lemon Chicken Francese*
Serves: 2 hungry people or 4 polite people

2 b/s-less chicken breasts (if you have 4 polite people, cut them each in half)
1 1/2 C. chicken broth
1 egg
1 tiny dribble of cold water
flour
salt
pepper
2 lemons (+ 1 for garnishing, 'cause look how pretty. You must also use fresh lemons.)
olive oil
3 T. butter
1 T. flour
parsley
some cooked angel hair pasta

Put flour in bowl, season with salt and pepper. In another bowl, scramble egg with cold water. Flatten chicken breasts with a meat tenderizing mallet, or other method of your choice. Dip in flour mixture, then in egg, then back in flour mixture. Fry in olive oil until golden brown, cooked, and delicious. Evacuate to a platter, preferably on top of the cooked pasta, and keep warm via oven on lowest setting or tin foil hat.

Wipe the pan with a paper towel to get rid of the black burnedy bits. Melt the butter, and whisk in flour. Stir and cook for a couple minutes, then whisk in the broth. Stir until it thickens a little bit, then squeeze those lemons for all they are worth into the sauce. Take off the heat, and stir in some chopped parsley. Pour over platter of chicken and pasta, and garnish with lemon.

Put in face.

*It is fun to say, and will make you feel fancy. Click on the little play button here so you know how.

Whales are Dumb

2011-08-21T18:35:00.003-06:00

Today, on Things Jana Has An Opinion About: whale songs.

While reviewing a list of things I need at the hospital, I noticed that one of the items I require is a music-playing device that DH has loaded with whale songs. I humbly (not really) submit that this is the dumbest idea ever. The last thing I want to listen to when I am cranky, crotchety, and in pain is this:

I remain unsoothed. SHUT UP, WHALES. If anything, I am more filled with rage and annoyance than I was 2 minutes and 58 seconds ago, and I'm not even in labor. Is this some sort of cruel trick on pregnant women? Or upon their poor partners, upon whom vengence would inevitably be visited?

Baby needed a towel

2011-04-26T14:16:00.001-06:00

I decided my baby needed a super de duper cute towel. So I made her one! Since she is unavailable for the near future, she is here represented by 10 lbs. of all-purpose flour. It is all-purpose, you know. Also, there are matching washcloths. As well there should be.

Here is the tutorial I used!

Ivers & Pond Piano

2011-04-04T13:14:00.007-06:00

We love our new apartment so much. For one thing, it is possible to have a piano!

This is our new baby, a 1906 Ivers & Pond. It sounds great, and is built much like a tank, which will come in handy for future moves. Ron found an original advertisement for it:

For more details and pics, check out Ron's Woodshop blog.

The Scariest Apartment Ever

2011-03-14T11:03:00.001-06:00

On Saturday, we went apartment hunting. In our hunt, we found the Scariest Apartment Ever. We thought it was a little expensive at $700+utilities for 2 bedrooms in this area. It is right downtown, above a thrift store and a small Mexican market. At first, it was difficult to find. Finally, we climbed up some peeling stairs off the street and found a stairwell with three doors. None of the doors were labeled, but we thought the one with "GET LOST B!&$%" scratched into it might be it. It was not. A nice bearded man opened another of the doors and said that he was expecting us, and that we had missed the correct door. Not to worry, he said, come through my apartment, and I will take you there, for all the apartments are interconnected.

After winding through the nice bearded man's apartment, we entered a communal sun room which connected all the apartments. There was a door leading to rickety metal stairs, and thence to the large parking lot for the downtown stores. It was filled with strange smelling couches, broken bicycles, and playing cards. He told us that everyone liked to hang out there.

Bearded man then took us up a couple steps, opened the door to the apartment, then down a couple steps into the apartment. The inside was like a strange warren of rooms. I was afraid I would get lost, and they would never find me. I considered that if we moved in, what if I forgot how to get to the baby's room? The apartment might eat the baby.

The nice bearded man pointed out that since the building was built at the beginning of time, that the walls, ceilings, and floors did not meet at right angles. Indeed, all the ceilings curved in towards the center in every room, with spidery cracks radiating like sunbeams away from them. He suggested that we use shims on our bookcases, so they would not fall over. Bearded man was nice.

After noticing that we had actually been through the apartment four times without noticing we had been going in circles, we found the front door. It was accessed by going down a very long, absurdly narrow flight of peeling, odd-smelling stairs and straight to the door. Nothing but a door. Just a flight of stairs in the floor, just to a door. The door was fully glass. Nice bearded man said that since the glass front door led straight on to Center Street, sometimes people would walk into the apartment, and suggested we keep it locked. So this would happen. I considered the need for curtains.

Both bedrooms (?? I think. I really couldn't make a definite count. It was too confusing) had huge, almost full-wall windows bordering Center Street. I considered curtains again.

The bathroom had a clawfoot tub with large flowers tole-painted on, and a small plastic shower attachment.

On the way out, we discovered a laundry room. It seemed to leap out at us, all unawares. Also a closet.

It was like I imagine being on drugs would be like. In fact, I feel the whole complex would be an ideal situation for one of the following groups:

*A den of hippies

*An extensive polygamous family

*A small cult

Nice bearded man led us out again, as we had neglected to leave a trail of breadcrumbs. I tried not to read the doors this time.

Look what I am making!

2011-02-24T12:41:00.001-07:00

Coming August 31: Baby.

And then the bed broke.

2011-01-12T12:22:00.002-07:00

Remember the mold? Yes. We decided to sleep on our air mattress at my parents' house that day, and plus it was before the New Years party when we were going to stay there anyway. We ended up sleeping on said air mattress for three days, during which time I got much less sleep than normal because of the staying up late chatting and getting up earlier because of fun things happening.

All this to say, when we got home, I was exhausted and really looking forward to a good night's sleep in my own bed. I was so tired. So very, very tired. We got into bed, I sighed happily and snuggled to the perfect sleeping position....

CRACK.

After sleepily staggering out of bed, we hauled the mattresses off to see what the deal was.

Awesome.

Ron suggested we either drive BACK to my parents' house, or set up the air mattress in our living room AGAIN until we could fix the bed.

I cried.

Instead, we hauled the top mattress into the living room (which, coincidentally, is exactly the size of a queen-size mattress) and I fell into bed at last.

WHY.

And now Ron has fixed it, so all is well again! Hooray!

Our apartment is moldy!

2010-12-29T14:16:00.004-07:00

A week or two ago, I noticed that there were some strange black spots in the ceiling corner of our bedroom, on the outside wall. They trailed some ways down, so I scrubbed them away. I couldn't reach all the way down because our bed was in the way. Our neighbors said that they had discovered the same thing.

Today, we decided to have a Great Cleaning. We pulled the furniture away from the walls.... and there was MOLD. LOTS of mold. A solid hand-span of mold in two corners! EW. Ron scrubbed and scrubbed it all away, and it smelled like rotten eggs.

Then we looked in the window. We don't usually have that window open.

AUGHHHH!! It was at this point we thought to take pictures, and also call maintenance to see if there's something wrong with the buildings. How long have we been breathing this stuff?? That can't be right.

Writing Desk

2010-12-25T20:22:00.000-07:00

Ron made this for me for Christmas! It is a replica of Thomas Jefferson's writing desk, the one he wrote the Declaration of Independence on. It is also made from a redwood tie of the Transcontinental Railroad. He is so cool.

This is it when it is closed.

You can prop it up! For writing things. Or reading books I guess.

Then THAT part flips open and it is another surface for writing, if you enjoy writing on felt. Also for flannelgrams. Although probably Thomas Jefferson did not know about flannelgrams.

This is inside the little drawer! There are fancy inks and dip pens of different kinds, and also a tooled leather book.

In Which our Car Gets Into An Accident

2010-11-29T19:42:00.004-07:00

As some of you who live by us know, it has been extremely snowy, cold, and icy lately. Early this morning, we got a call saying that our car had been hit by someone sliding on the ice in the parking lot, and the police were out there! DANG IT. I was hoping for a best case scenario of maybe just knocking out a headlight or something.

As it turns out, the only thing damaged was the license plate holder, and the guy gave us $20 for a new one. SCORE!

Hooray! It is a Christmas miracle! We have been blessed.

I hate colds

2010-11-22T15:48:00.001-07:00

We both have the cold! I really hate colds. Ron bravely braved the snow and ice to go get us provisions. Provisions here meaning aloe vera kleenex and pizza. Bless him.

DIY Chatelaine

2010-08-25T15:13:00.004-06:00

Chatelaines are clips or pins that you wear at the waist, with chains to hold things that you need. I wanted one. I needed one. You know, because I work at a living history museum. Occasionally. All right, I just wanted to be fancy when I sewed things. Unfortunately, I do not have a million kajillion dollars, as indeed you need. Instead, I used:

*A gold ish pin from the thrift store
* Chain
*Lobster clasps
Total cost: about $3.

Comparison: $70.99

Then you need some things to put on it!

Like storky scissors! They were about $7.

Comparison: $46.99

And a seam ripper encased in wood, made by your darling husband. This... is probably the thing I use most.

A pin cushion!

It is made of $1 worth of jewelry finding type stuff I found at the craft store, sandwiching a ball of fabric filled with fluff.

This was the inspiration. Cost: $39.99
The tape measure is a retractable Singer tape measure. I'm still figuring out how to make it fit the rest of the set. Probably I will recover it with brown leather. Anyway, it's a darn sight better than paying $54.99.

Steampunk Necklace

2010-08-25T15:05:00.003-06:00

I like the steampunk-type aesthetic. So I made this necklace! It required:
1. A watch Ron got in Afghanistan for $5
2. A chain
3. A Christmas ornament with an odd plastic jewel in the middle

First I took the watch apart.

Then I tried prying the plastic jewel off with the tip of Ron's file. It broke off the tip. Oops. Ron then drilled into the middle with a Yankee screwdriver...

...and popped it off using the screw as a handle.

Then I put them together and made this!

I like it lots! I am a little disappointed though. It was a self-winding watch, so if you move it around the gears move. Sadly, after I glued it down to the pendant, it will no longer move by itself. :'(

I sewed things!

2010-08-24T13:56:00.005-06:00

Sometimes when Ron is gone, I get bored. I tell a lie. Always when Ron is gone, I get bored. He was gone for 3 weeks. So I made these things!

A hat of corduroy (for because it is washable, unlike his other wool one). The vest was a hand-me-down. It's nice though, chocolate-brown wool. I mended a lot of holes, replaced the buttons with the snazzy brass ones, and found a $13 pocket watch at Wal-Mart. I then took apart a bracelet I do not wear and attached a small golden bear to the fob. Because it is dandy.

The shirt used to be a dress that I found at a thrift store. I loved the top, but the bottom was just too snug. The bottom is made from Butterick 4803, in a linen-cotton blend. I sort of cloned this skirt.

You may recall this coat from earlier. I made it from an Army blanket I found in my closet from Butterick 5272. It didn't fit like I wanted to, because I screwed up the sizing and did a crap job on the buttons. I tailored it and replaced the buttons with clasps, and now I like it much more.

I also made most of this earlier from Simplicity 4055, but again, I screwed up the sizing and had to do terrible things to make it fit. Finally I gave up, ripped off the top, and did it again from scratch. Much better!

Irreparable pair of jeans into purse. The idea for the closure comes from here. Thanks!

I found this dress at the thrift store as well. I added snaps between the buttons, because they gap reeeeeeally bad whenever you do anything but stand up really straight. That is probably the reason it made its way to the thrift store. ;) I really like it, it's got a 40's vibe. It's even got pockets!

Ron calls this my 60's Air Hostess dress. He is not wrong. It is from Simplicity 2403, in a linen-cotton blend. It's got pockets too! Hooray.

Finishing My Coffin

2010-07-14T01:01:00.002-06:00

Without a back, I had to leave the coffin in a fragile state, all alone in the shop all weekend. Fortunately, there was no damage when I inspected it Tuesday morning

So I started off the day by spacing the coffin. By the way, see those big 'ol boards sticking up? Those needed to be planed down

Planed with a hatchet! No way I'm going through that much wood with a hand plane for a rough-cut coffin

How rough-cut? Extremely. There are tool marks, protruding nails, and it is nowhere near square — in short, it is the most authentic toe-pincher coffin you will ever see, every detail meticulously planned and executed

I'm still debating adding shelves. On the one hand, if I do not, tourists can pose for pictures within; on the other, shelves are awesome. What do you think?

Building My Own Coffin — Day Two

2010-07-14T00:45:00.006-06:00

Sorry for the delay, finishing the coffin ended up taking a day longer than expected, mostly because I decided to use some old moulding planes

Can you guess what they're for? If so, you're at the top of your class!

These particular planes are for cutting tongue-and-groove joints

Sides assembled and awaiting construction

Putting it all together

Stay tuned in, and you'll soon see the finished product!

Building My Own Coffin

2010-07-06T19:42:00.003-06:00

So I decided to build my own coffin. By hand. After spending about six hours on it today, this is what I've accomplished:

Drawn up the plans

Cut the lumber — Pine and Fir, for those interested

Planed the boards
Taken a short break to relax.

Tomorrow I'll be putting everything together, then finishing up the outside. Here's hoping I finish, because otherwise you'll have to wait to see the finished product until next week!

Refurbishing an old Workbench

2010-06-30T22:11:00.007-06:00

Several days ago my father in law, Roger, was talking with his neighbor Bill, who generously donated his father's old workbench to Roger's traditional woodwright's shop. Bill's father obtained the workbench in Massachusetts from an older Italian gentleman. The bench's history trails off before then, but we have cleverly deduced that it was hand made, with the posible exception of the vice screws, and dates to 1900, give or take a couple of decades. The workbench is made of rock maple, but when I first saw it I had my doubts as to it's potential.

When in doubt, smile and soldier on

I suppose it shows potential

Potential for SPIDERS! So many webs, and even some egg sacs hiding under the benchtop

A huge ginormous crack running the length of the workbench.

I was all for taking everything apart, milling each board, then shoving it back together, good as new. Fortunately Roger was the voice of reason, and we called up Dave, the local high school woodshop teacher, for advice. He recommended that if we were so foolish as to insist on refinishing the bench, we proceed using only hand tools, and preserve as much of the patina as possible.

This solution suited us just fine, and this morning found the workbench disassembled at Roger's traditional workshop, with the beams being planed down to produce a proper fit.

That is my favorite plane. It is simply a joy to use

After fitting the benchtop back together, we found out that the old lag screw holes still left us with gaps in the beams, so we clamped everything in place and drilled new holes. This was probably the most painful part of the project — who would have imagined that drilling holes in antique rock maple would be difficult?

After reassembling the workbench, it was time to scrape off all that old paint (well, most of it), plane the surface smooth, and generously apply tung oil and wax

The bench, immediately prior to finishing

Here is the finished workbench

Stupid dinner, I hate you!

2010-05-26T13:46:00.003-06:00

Ron is off doing army-type training today, so I am alone for dinner. I thought I'd be really virtuous and make actual, real dinner. This was just after I just got off work and was super hungry. So I made some Shepherd's Pie, lots of cheese on top, cooked it for half an hour so the cheese would be all crispy and delicious, *bing!* opened the door, got hot pads, picked up the handles......

WHAT.

WHAT.

WHAT.

Now I am eating what I scraped out of the middle because I am dang hungry, and waiting for it to cool down so I can clean it up. Also, because I'm mad at it right now and if I start cleaning it up now I'm just going to get more pissy.

And also also, that was one of my favorite dishes.

Happy Anniversary to Us!

2010-05-19T20:46:00.016-06:00

About six years ago a young Ron first met a young Jana in a high school botany class. They quickly hit it off, and started dating — just after young Ron dropped out of high school to join the Utah Army National Guard.

Young Ron was much geekier back then

As Ron wondered what he had gotten himself into,
Second from the right

Jana finished up school and went on to attend college

Theirs was a symbiotic relationship, in that young Jana would make cookies and send them to young Ron, who would then eat cookies. In return, Ron came back home to her whenever he had the chance
and was always enthusiastically welcomed home

On one such occasion, young Ron and Jana took a walk in Provo, and young Ron asked Jana to marry him. She said yes, then quickly changed her mind and said "no — maybe later". A week later, at the Military Intelligence Ball, she saw reason and said yes for reals. As young Jana's parents were planning a mission for the LDS Church, the happy young couple decided they should probably tell them, lest they miss the wedding!
Just thought you guys might want to be there is all...
By the way, do you know what is brown and sticky?
......a STICK!

Ron then headed off to the last part of his two year training period at Fort Huachuca, and wedding plans were made. On May 19th, 2007, Ron and Jana found themselves married at the Logan Utah Temple.
Omygosh, Rings!

Trouble brewed, and Ron found himself in Afghanistan on the couples first anniversary. The anniversary that Jana in her grief purposefully forgot — then forgot to tell Ron to forget, so he was all sad that she forgot. But it all worked out alright.
Worked out with smooches!

Their second anniversary was spent happily together, but clouds loomed for the third, for Ron was asked to train troops deploying to Iraq, starting on the 20th — then starting on the 19th of May! Alas! It is enough to make Ron want to wear his grouchy shirt, but that shirt was left at home. Instead, he will simply wish Jana a happy anniversary, and publicly declare his love and affection for her!
Love you Forever!

Baby robins and baby pioneers

2010-05-12T22:06:00.002-06:00

When last we saw our robin friends, they were tiny sweet blue eggs. Now they are sweet fluffy little

AUGH! AUGH! AUGH! Hit it with a shoe!

Just kiddin'. They are not the most attractive little babies I've ever seen though. But look at this li'l guy! Awwwwww.

Robin Nest

2010-05-06T22:12:00.002-06:00

We found a lovely, perfect robin's nest on the fence at work. Sadly, this robin has got to have the brains of a rock, because this is a terrible place to put a nest. I hope the babies survive the cats and raccoons and whatnot. *bite nails*

Grilling Day

2010-04-23T18:32:00.003-06:00

Friday is my day to cook dinner. Once warm weather hits, that means getting out our little grill and using it as often as possible.

I'm told our grill is "cute"

Today we had grilled salmon and watermelon, corn, and rice with noodles and broccoli. All was delicious - but I don't recommend grilling watermelon. It doesn't do all that much for it.

It is a testament to the deliciousness of the meal that Jana and I didn't manage any conversation throughout dinner - we were too busy wolfing it all down

I'm excited for corn on the cob to become available, as it is one of my favorite grilled foods. We're also fans of naan, kabobs, and, of course, hamburgers and fries.

What are your favorite grilled foods? Let us know in the comments.

Cake! With strawberries.

2010-04-19T12:25:00.003-06:00

I brought this cake to a potluck. It is french vanilla, filled with plum cardamon jam, and frosted with cream cheese frosting.

We didn't get to bring any home. ;)

I like doing the frosting like this, because then I don't have to bother getting it perfectly smooth. To do this, tap the tip of a butter knife against the frosting and pull it away. Easy! And lazy. Yay!

Knotty Wood

2010-04-17T22:10:00.003-06:00

It has been a fine day of bowl turning. Surprisingly, each bowl I turned turned out to be knotty

These two are made from a branch of black walnut. One of the knots on the bowl above broke out, but I think it turned out alright anyways.

This box elder is my knottiest box to date.

New Chuck and Butter Churn

2010-04-14T10:02:00.006-06:00

As you may recall, the chuck I was borrowing from my father in law exploded a while back As it is extremely difficult to make most things without a good chuck, I was able to convince Jana to let me buy a new one. Thank you Jana!

Yesterday when I came home from school I found a mysterious box waiting for me

I selected the PSI CSC2000C Barracude Wood Lathe Chuck System, which came in a handy red storage case

The case really is quite nice - it even includes spaces for other chuck accessories (sold separately)

The chuck itself is heavy, well made, and smooth. I was leery of the bar adjustment mechanism at first, but have since fallen in love with it

Of course, anything new in my workshop gets an opportunity to get dirty, and the chuck was no exception. You can also see here the PSI live center I bought with the chuck, which is also very nice.

During Baby Animal Days I was approached by a local potter, who wanted me to make a dasher for a butter churn he had made. We decided some black walnut would be the best option.

I admit, it was a pain in the butt to get the two parts of the dasher to fit perfectly together. Fortunately, I am awesome.

I consulted Jana on the proper fit of the dasher, as she is the resident butter churning expert. The disk fits perfectly in the bottom, and has about 1/2 inch clearance around the sides of the churn.

It's finished with some butcher block conditioner - we want a food safe butter churn, after all.

Garden 2010

2010-04-11T13:42:00.004-06:00

This year, I am growing some Farmer's Market lettuce mix, "Garden Babies" miniature head lettuce, chives, and Saltwater Taffy Swirl sweetpeas. Hopefully. I'm a little worried about the sweetpeas, since it snowed a couple times right after I planted them, but hopefully they'll be okay.

Last year, I dug up a clump of chives from my mom's garden and potted them, and they did splendidly! When fall came, I wrapped them up in an old blanket and stored them outside on the porch, hoping they'd survive. For a couple weeks after I got them out, they remained brown and dead, and I thought they had died. Just when I was about to pull them out and chuck them, I noticed a few tentative little green shoots. Now look at them! Well done, chives.

I planted the lettuce about a week and a half ago, and this morning I noticed two things:

1. Tiny little lettuce seedlings

2. A large hole where a child had mistaken my planter for a sandbox. Sigh. I swept up all the dirt I could, replaced it and reseeded the hole so it will be just fine again. I also taped a layer of cheesecloth over the top to protect it a little bit for a while. Hopefully once it gets growing, it won't look like a sandbox. The planter used to be an aquarium. We found it by the dumpster.

The sweetpeas are planted in the long planters, where I'm going to try to train them up to the ceiling, here represented by terrible green lines.

Wish me luck!

Baby Animal Days 2010!

2010-04-09T21:33:00.003-06:00

The past two days were spent volunteering at BAnD. Formerly known as BAD, the institution decided BAnD was a better acronym for Baby Animal Days

THERE WERE BEARS!

Some bears were dead

and bunnies!

and Maggie the Mammoth - the saddest mammoth in the history of the world.

I also took the opportunity to get a 19th century wood lathe back in working order. It was a chore, but not a huge one.

Magic Wands

2010-04-07T21:56:00.003-06:00

I just finished some more magic wands for Baby Animal Days this weekend. If you're in town, be sure to stop by and visit!

From top to bottom: Birch, Fir, Black Walnut, and Maple

I'm especially proud of this maple wand.

Peep S'Mores and the first grill of the season

2010-04-05T13:47:00.002-06:00

We had some friends over and Ron made lovely dinner for them on the grill, with chicken kebabs, asparagus, naan...

And Peep s'mores!

Exploding Chuck

2010-04-04T17:41:00.003-06:00

It was a normal day out in the shop, I'd just finished rounding out some black walnut and put it into the chuck to start hollowing it out into a lovely bowl when BLAM! the chuck I was using exploded in my face!

At first I wasn't sure what was going on, my blood was pumping, I was hyperventilating, and momentarily disoriented. High on adrenaline I switched off my lathe as Jana came running out onto the porch, having heard the loud explosion.

By then, I realized that it was the chuck that blew apart - hitting one of my shelves and loosening it from the wall in the process, and spent some time looking for the bit that came off, without luck. As I came inside, I saw it by my dryer, a good ten feet behind me!

Fortunately, the chuck missed my head, chest, and other organs, and I emerged none the worse for wear, especially as my father in law, who loaned me the chuck, said that he has gotten more than his money back from it and so I don't have to worry about paying him back.

So now I just need $130 to buy a new one for myself - keep your fingers crossed for baby animal days!

Videos From Afghanistan Part 3 - Life on the FOB

2010-04-04T13:26:00.002-06:00

Our mighty team leader, demonstrating the futility of card houses

"Shaking It" in the meeting room

Disposing of ordinance on a small scale

Disposing of ordinance on a grand scale

And that's all the video you get of Afghanistan. Hope you've enjoyed it.

Videos From Afghanistan Part 2 - Visiting Villages

2010-04-03T13:18:00.001-06:00

In order to reach a village we first had to drive along as far as the road would take us - by the way, this is one of the better roads

We would then hike into the village, sometimes as far as 15 kilometers from the road.

Sometimes we would see strange things, such as this "bridge"

Thankfully, I was with some of the best men in the world, who always took our mission seriously - here is a scene while waiting for the birds to take us to a remote village

Videos From Afghanistan Part 1 - Pop Rocks

2010-04-02T12:57:00.000-06:00

While I was in Afghanistan Jana sent me some pop rocks. Not wanting to waste the opportunity, I made sure to distribute them to the locals.

Of course, not everyone would trust me enough to try them

And even when they did, there wasn't always much of a reaction - although you can hear the kid coughing at the very end of the video

But sometimes I struck comedic gold

New Shelves and other projects

2010-04-01T20:46:00.006-06:00

Some of you may remember our old shelves, made of some abandoned shelves and cheap brackets.

Well, I recently had some plywood left over from another project and took the opportunity to make some new shelves, which are, I hope you'll agree, vastly superior.

A simple but elegant design I picked up in the 'stan

Our dryer also went on the fritz a while back, and as the manufacturer wanted $200+parts just to look at it, I took the opportunity to pick up a new skill. After determining that the motor was bad, I called around town and found one repair place that had the right motor in stock, because they had ordered it accidentally and would be sending it back to the manufacturer the next day. I was able to get it for slightly more than their cost, and spent a happy afternoon fixing our dryer, which now works like a charm.

And, of course, I've been turning more things on my lathe, many of which will be available for purchase at baby animal days next weekend, for those of you in town who are interested. They include bowls, magic wands, and spinning tops, while supplies last!

I'm especially pleased with this box

Check out Jana's new blog!

2010-04-01T15:21:00.001-06:00

Take a look over at my new blog, Time Travel Kitchen. I will find meal plans from really old cookbooks, try them out, and tell you about them. Hooray! It will be fun I hope.

Hooray for Good Eats! And thrift stores.

2010-03-15T15:41:00.004-06:00

I love Good Eats. Did you know that when Alton Brown chops onions, the onions cry? It is true. Happily for me, I just found these at the thrift store.

Value: about $215
Paid: $36

Woo! Take that, Bethany!

Pretty Sweet Weekend

2010-02-15T13:30:00.007-07:00

The weekend has been pretty dang good thus far - all the better as I don't have any school until Wednesday. Who knew that taking 21 credits could be so easy?

I spent Friday helping my big brother build some big shelves in his garage.

Then I took the scenic route home and was able to take some rather fine pictures of the valley
And took Jana out to a Valentine's Day dinner and dance, forgetting only the camera to take some pictures of how awesome we looked. Jana wore her new cherry blossom dress (You can see it in the contra dancing video) and I wore my class A uniform. Pretty schnazzy.

Sunday we taught Sunday school at church, telling people all about the story of Noah and how it applies to our lives today, then had some delicious homemade pretzels with raspberry butter and almost an entire box of Lindt Petits Desserts Chocolates for dinner, before going over to our neighbors to play some Jenga, Cranium, and Quiddler.

And now I'm headed out to my shop to turn something awesome on the lathe - don't know what it is yet, but it will be fabulous.

Contra Dancing

2010-02-08T15:52:00.006-07:00

Contra dancing is fun! We like it. You may recognize it as a peppier form of the dancing in your favorite Jane Austen movie. Unfortunately, we keep forgetting when Contra Dance Night is, so we haven't gone for a while. The one night we did remember, the very very local news channel happened to be there. So, if you look closely at about 1:25 or so, you may see us.

Congratulations to Ron!

2010-01-31T17:06:00.002-07:00

Ron now has an associates degree in Russian! Well done! Only one more associates and a bachelors to go...

Bed Fixing

2010-01-28T13:22:00.003-07:00

Ron and I found a fancy bed from the 1920's at a yard sale, and thought it would be perfect for Ron's mom for Christmas! Unfortunately, it was dirty, the bottom parts of the headboard were warped, and the finish was in awful shape.

But we did not let that deter us! So we took it apart, and put it back together with glue, and stripped finish, and applied paint...

And now it is so lovely!

We had this great plan where I would take Ron's mother out for ice cream, and then Ron would put the bed together in her absence so she would be surprised (and hopefully pleased) when she got back. Unfortunately, her bed was a twin size, and it turned out the bed was full size. Lame. Luckily we solved that with a full size mattress set a few weeks later, thanks to freecycle!

Jana, Museum-Displayed Artist

2010-01-23T16:49:00.002-07:00

Due to my fine rug-making skills, my work is now displayed in a museum. Well, the display portion of the museum I work at seasonally. As you can see, I am very proud.

See it? See it? The stripy business? Oh yes. In fact, I was so proud, I was bragging to a dude that was there at the museum opening yesterday about me being now a famous museum-displayed artist, and how I had purposefully laid each and every speck of crud on it in an artistic manner.

He turned out to be the dude that painted the mural that spans the whole exhibit.

I guess his dirt is okay-looking too.

On the Town

2010-01-20T21:38:00.003-07:00

Upon careful consideration of the hottest spots in town, we determined that the ideal location for a night on the town would be Saturday afternoon at the Museum of Anthropology. We did hear that clubbing was the thing, but baby seals are getting scarce and we really think they should really be saved for special occasions.

The bouncer at the door even gave us these very fine pith helmets!

In exchange for grinding some corn.

Friends inform us that a vital part of a wild night out is experimenting with pots. Or something like that, I was thinking about whether or not you could housebreak a dik-dik at the time.

Lathe Project Part III

2010-01-18T19:03:00.000-07:00

By virtue of a lifetime of tetris playing, I was able to fit my lathe in my apartment workshop.

Of course with it here in my own home, I had no choice but to turn some wood.

Clockwise from top: A box, a goblet, a top, and another box. I'd like to mention that everything but the top center box was turned from the block in the above picture.

All in all, today was a fine day of wood turning. My brother and his kids were even able to come over and turn some awesome magic wands.

Lathe Project Part II

2010-01-15T20:40:00.005-07:00

After some more research on the lathe, I've discovered that it is a Delta Homecraft 46-230, likely made in either 1948 or 1949. I am most likely the 7th owner, but possibly the sixth. In spite of all this, the lathe shows almost no signs of wear.

With the lathe cleaned and the stand refinished, it was time to get the motor running and hook everything up. There was some doubt as to what was wrong with the motor, as the only description of it was that "it started smoking and sparking soon after being turned on." My father in law theorized that it was most likely the result of the motor being plugged into a 220 plug while wired for 110. His hypothesis was that if we were to wire the motor for 110 and plug it into a 110 outlet, the motor would work.

After wiring the motor and preparing the fire extinguisher, we plugged in the motor and were pleased to note that it ran like a dream. The next step was to put the motor back on the bench and install the power switch. This monstrosity is only 3/4 hp and weighs in at about 60 pounds.

Wisely deciding to put the power switch on the front of the lathe, I had the opportunity to use my situp muscles to drill two holes in the bench.

Holes drilled, we cut the power cord and ran it through the bench.

At this point we were ready to install the power switch. So we did.

Wiring done, we switched the machine on.

It worked!

We subjected the lathe to intensive testing, and nothing we threw at it could slow it down.

Huzzah for a new lathe!

Lathe Project Part I

2010-01-13T23:26:00.001-07:00

On a recent trip to Washington my father in law was able to obtain a lathe that had belonged to some of his relatives. As he already owns two, he decided to give it to me on a lifetime loan system.

Although the serial number places the year of manufacturer at about 1949, the lathe has seldom been used in the interim and has no major signs of wear.

The venerable Montgomery Ward 110/220 motor. According to the prior owner the first time he tried to run the lathe the motor started producing sparks and so he shut it off and never started it up again (Likely because he used it with the wrong voltage). We plan to rewire it this weekend and see if we can get it working. If not, we've got a spare that will hopefully work out alright. More on that in part II.

Although the lathe is in almost new condition, it has sat in a workshop for many, many, many years - more years than I've been alive. Paint, stain, and other chemicals had made their marks, the stand was in need of some serious attention and the lathe needed some cleaning.

I decided to only refinish the maple benchtop on the lathe table. The legs weren't very dirty to begin with, and the blue paint worked too well with the lathe to be removed.

A bit of sanding and some tung oil produced very favorable results.

I next used an air compressor to clean out all the dust that had accumulated over the years and gave all the parts a quick wash and some oil.

To finish the cleaning process I dressed the rails with some 60 grit sandpaper

The lathe after cleaning and assembly

So now I've got a brand new 40" lathe that's almost three times as old as I am! Keep your fingers crossed for the electrical work this weekend, and hopefully it will end up working as good as it looks. Many thanks to my father in law for finding the lathe and aiding me in the restoration.

On the Road and Hangin' By a Song

2009-11-29T21:27:00.002-07:00

We just got back from Thanksgiving with my sister Bethany, captain of the Good Ship Lollipop. It was lovely!

We were thankful for nice cuddly nieces...

And for tasty Thanksgiving dinner...

(Sometimes my B.S. in Home and Family Living sort of explodes out in the form of tomato roses, carrot daisies, radish water lilies, and green onion sprigs. It may be a sickness.)

And for the ReStore, where Ron found this neato miter box...

And for not living in Boulder, Colorado.

My First Chip Carving

2009-11-18T22:20:00.003-07:00

"Ron", my wife said as I walked in the door one day, "I need a wilkom sign in the Pennsylvania Dutch style."

"What's that now?" I responded.

"One of these!" She stated, showing me the following picture:

"Okay..." I said in dubious tone. "I'll have to learn how to do chip carving first."

"Oh look!" She responded, "I brought this instruction book home from the library today! We even have that round cutting board you can make it out of!"

Having no further excuse, I bought a fine chip carving knife and set to.

The first step was to lay out the design in pencil. Using my trusty Swanson combination square and my compass I found the center of the cutting board and transferred the design onto it with some carbon paper. This was more complicated than it sounds, because the original pattern was meant for a plaque 13 inches across, and my cutting board is only 9 inches across. To top it off, I screwed up on the reduction and ended up wasting space along the border. Not wanting to erase everything and start over, I decided to soldier on and start my chip carving off with the tiniest, most detailed tulips imaginable.

I love the reflection left behind on the transfer paper.

Carving the first flower. As you can see, the tulip bulb isn't the prettiest of pretty things, but not all that bad for my first time.

Center of the design completed. At this point I was really starting to get the hang of chip carving, but there remained a lot of tear-out in the lines. I believe this is caused mostly by my selection of wood. Next time I'll get something softer than an old cutting board.

Halfway through the border. I'm rather proud of the fine tulip stems on the right, those things are incredibly annoying to carve.

The finished plaque along with the primary tool used in it's construction - my carving knife.

The finished project in my shop. I rather like my shop.

Here the plaque stands on our door, where it will stay until I modify the pattern to fit the entire cutting board and carve up the reverse side. After that I'll get some nice basswood and carve the complete wilkom sign.

Care Package Reruns

2009-11-18T11:55:00.009-07:00

For the Thanksgiving/Christmas season, I am recycling these care package ideas from when Ron was in Afghanistan. 'Tis the season where troops overseas could use care packages from home. It is lonely, being without your family during the holidays, and I am awfully glad he is with me this Christmas.

*Send a pie!

Hostess pies work pretty good too.

*Send lovely wooly socks that are good for hiking
Ron - L.L. Bean Boot Socks are the absolute best hiking socks in the world.
Many thanks to my father-in-law for sending some out to me.

*Send interesting books

*Send a Christmas tree, along with tacks and fancy gift tags signed by each family member and/or friend you can get ahold of.

*Do that sweet Hickory Farms deal

*Send Fruit Chillers if they've got access to a freezer, Rolo Cookies, or Chocolate Cherry Rice Krispie Treats

And remember:
The post office will give you a deal if you are sending care packages to soldiers. Just ask for the APO/FPO Flat Rate Box. You can either:
1. Find one of their fancy USA troop care package boxes with the stars and stripes on it
2. Send a normal flat rate box (they'll tell you the size you need) and get money automatically deducted for sending to an APO address.

This means that your package will cost $10.95 to send all the way to Afghanistan! Bargain!

Here is some things not to send.
- Securities, currency or precious metals in their raw unmanufactured state.
- Obscene articles, prints, paintings, cards, film, horror comics.
- Material depicting nude or seminude persons, pornographic material.
- Mail containing religious materials contrary to the Islamic faith.
- Pork or pork by-products.
- Alcoholic beverages or materials used to produce alcoholic beverages (i.e., distilling material, hops, malts, yeast, etc.).
- Fruits, animals and living plants.
- Firearms of any type.

Yes, more cheese.

2009-11-16T16:50:00.002-07:00

As some of you may remember, I earlier discussed how I made cheese at my job as a 1860's living history museum docent. My secret shame was that I had no historical evidence of this kind of cheese being made, just a personal conviction that it was likely. But now is the time for vindication. Thank you, Feeding America!

Vinegar and Lemon Wheys.
Pour into boiling milk as much vinegar or lemon-juice as will make a small quantity quite clear, dilute with hot water to an agreeable smart acid, and put a bit or two of sugar. This is less heating than if made of wine; and if only to excite perspiration, answers as well.
~Rundell, Maria Eliza Ketelby. A New System Of Domestic Cookery, Formed Upon Principles Of Economy, And Adapted To The Use Of Private Families. By A Lady. Boston: W. Andrews, 1807.

Hooray! I'm sure my thriving 1860's living history museum docent fanbase is thrilled.

And as a bonus:

SAGE CHEESE. --Take some of the young top leaves of the sage plant, and pound them in a mortar till you have extracted the juice. Put the juice into a bowl, wipe out the mortar, put in some spinach leaves, and pound them till you have an equal quantity of spinach juice. Mix the two juices together, and stir them into the warm milk immediately after you have put in the rennet. You may use sage juice alone; but the spinach will greatly improve the colour; besides correcting the bitterness of the sage.
~Leslie, Eliza. Directions for Cookery, in its Various Branches. Philadelphia: E.L. Carey & Hart, 1840.

Unhallowed Leftovers

2009-10-29T21:45:00.004-06:00

Once upon a time, Jana made some lovely, wonderful cheese. Since she loved her darling husband, Ron, she decided to take it home. On her way home, an chronologically gifted woman warned her that the cheese would remain in its present form for but a sennight, and would thereafter be transformed into a wyrd, unnatural creature of horror. Looking forward as she was to kisses, Jana did not heed the woman as she should.

The time came and passed, unnoticed by the blissful couple.

Flowers bloomed, faded, and swelled with fruit in their turn. Two months had gone by, and Ron and Jana were delighted with the bounty of the earth, for they were simple folk. The chronologically-gifted woman presented Ron and Jana with a large amount of peaches, warning them again that if the peaches were not enjoyed promptly, they would return as specters, swollen with horrors unknown to plague the happy couple. Ron filled two bins with these pleasant fruits, while Jana determined that she would do as the woman had said.

Jana set to with a will, eating the lovely peaches as quickly as she might. Infortuitously, Jana did not realize that the bins were numbered twain.

Together, the cheese and the remaining bin lurked unobserved, growing daily in evil and pestilence until they were mighty.

When at last Ron and Jana discovered the waxing horror, they recalled the chronologically-gifted woman and her words. Filled with grief and trepidation, the nevertheless bravely did their duty and cast forth the sponging revenants from their cottage, ne'er to return.

And they lived happily ever after.

Until they remembered about the beans.

We are dressing as Afghans for Halloween

2009-10-28T22:35:00.000-06:00

And we are so pretty!

Close Your Clothes!: A Quiet Book

2009-10-27T19:40:00.003-06:00

Quiet books are lovely activity books made of soft cushy materials. They were popular in the LDS community in the 70's, both for their ability to entertain children and their inability to make loud inappropriate noises in church. I dropped a hymn book once when I was in the choir, and it sounded like a timpani. I'm still cringing.

Anywhoodle, quiet books are really annoying to make, because to make one friggin' page about barn animals, you have to have 6 square inches of red felt, 2 square inches of yellow felt, 3 colors of embroidery floss, 5 beads, 1/2" of ribbon, 1 hook, 1 eye, a cow, a horse, a pig, a chicken, a goat, a sheep, a cat, etc. etc. etc. Lame. As a consequence, you end up with a leftover bolt of felt, a package of floss, a bag of beads, a spool of ribbon, a sack of hooks and eyes, and an assortment of kangaroos, zebras, giraffes, velociraptors, and hippos.

Until now.

Thanks to this lovely lady, my niece can have a quiet book for Christmas without making her auntie cry salty tears into a heap of felt scraps and pterodactyls.

Don't put your pants on your head, Fred!
You know you should put your legs in those.

Fasten up your buttons and your zip, Pip!
That's the way to wear your clothes.

Velcro fasteners, buttons or zip,
Got to do them up or you will trip.

If you run around with shoes undone,
You will fall and that's not fun.

Don't put the zipper 'round the back, Jack!
The hood will cover up your face.

And don't wear your mittens on your feet, Pete!
You'll be last in every race.

A belt for your skirt is very handy, Mandy.
It stops it falling to your knees.

And when you know just what to do, Sue,
You'll be as neat as you can be.

Clothes purchased from the thrift store, poem stolen from the British Council.

BDU Apron

2009-10-27T15:16:00.003-06:00

Ron had some old BDUs, like this:

I stole them a little. And added ruffles!

And a flower!

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Ribbon: hand-me-down from grandma
Button: Leftover from the regency dress
Ruffle fabric: Leftover from a hat
BDUs: Paid for by YOU!
--------------------------------
Cost to me: Free. Woo!

Army Blanket Coat

2009-10-15T19:51:00.002-06:00

I needed a coat to wear to my job where I dress like I live during WWI. Coat-weight wool is like $40/yd. There was a wool army blanket in my closet. Result:

Not only does it work great at my job, I'm going to rock it in my normal life. Yeah!

Butterick B5272

Tiny Tabbies

2009-10-09T21:00:00.003-06:00

People need to take care of their pets. Also, they seem to think that my workplace is a free dumping ground for their discarded pets. Not a year goes by but we get at least two or three litters of kittens chucked out by the parking lot. A week ago it happened again, with four kittens that were so loving and sociable that they must have come from a home where they'd been played with and loved... until someone got tired of taking care of them.

One kitty was really tiny, we think it froze somewhere or was eaten. The orange tabby thankfully got taken home by someone at an evening event. The two remaining grey tabbies were not very happy, it is much too cold this time of year for such tiny cats to be outside. They would run up to meet me every day, shivering and meowing piteously. A nice thing about aprons is that they are very good places to put sad cold kitties.

During a field trip, I showed the kids the kitties, hoping that someone would want one. A few kids said they'd ask their parents and then come right back and get them. When I came back today, one little girl actually had! Hooray!

The last little guy in the pictures got one of his claws torn out, possibly by one of the roosters. I hoped I could find him a home. To this end, while I was telling the children all about the farm animals, I included the poor li'l kitty and how it was all cold and alone. I also mentioned the importance of taking care of animals, both on a farm and in a home. One mom in particular was waffling on whether she wanted to take it or not, so I assisted her 8-year-old daughter in helping her decide. Ron says I used: 1.) Emotional Love Approach [Love of Kitties] 2.) Fear Up [mild-the kitty will freeze] 3.) Incentive [kitty] and 4.) Fear Down [the kitty will live if you take it]. But it was in a good cause!

Now the last little kitty has a loving home. I will miss him a lot, because he was cuddly and nice. I wanted to take him home really bad, but we can't have pets in our apartment.

Goodbye, tiny tabby! I will love you forever.

House Party!

2009-09-09T12:44:00.003-06:00

My grandparents have got a cabin. To me, the lovely thing about the cabin is not the cabin, but the beautiful place it sits on. It has got:

*Lawns for army crawling on

*A lake for canoeing on, with ducks for quacking at

*Snakes for catching

*Trees for climbing and throwing

*Bugs in the bathroom to scream at

*And a creek to freeze your toes off in

Scottish Festival

2009-08-31T19:53:00.004-06:00

My job has many perks, one of which was free admission to the Scottish Festival! One of the most amusing booths there was run by a club that does Medieval fighting. I have serious doubts about their skills though, because they kept getting severely and theatrically trounced by 5 year olds.

Most of the time we spent demonstrating a 2 man saw. It is a strange thing, but we find that little girls are most adept at this on their first try, easily . This young lady was able to tear through the log like wet kleenex while chatting on her cell phone.

"Hi. What? Kenzie, I'm BUSY."

These strapping young Scots were no match for Team Little Girl, and took about 5 times as long, but I think they make up for it in fanciness!

Regency dress

2009-08-13T22:53:00.003-06:00

I made this!

Searching Vehicles

2009-08-12T08:44:00.003-06:00

I'm up in Washington now, doing some training. Part of that training was searching some derelict vehicles that were hanging around, equipped to imitate known terrorist vehicles that have been captured in the U.S.

Conducting a vehicle search/questioning the driver.

Conducting a thorough search

Finding Gold

Tagging and Bagging the items of intelligence potential.

The final and most important step: Having my team pose with all the cool weapons we found.

New Toolbox!

2009-08-11T12:42:00.005-06:00

So, I made a toolbox a couple of weeks ago, with the generous help and advice of my father in law, who is an expert in such matters.

Cutting the wood

Cutting Dovetails

Chiseling out Dovetails

Using a low-angle plane to smooth the edges

Applying stain

Attaching the hardware

And here it is!

There are actually two drawers inside. I plan to make custom dividers for them as I acquire the rest of my tools.

And there you have it. The best in toolboxes made out of $30 of pine, some stain, hardware, and elbow grease.

Hats! So many hats!

2009-07-29T21:35:00.004-06:00

After my first bonnet went so splendidly...

I decorated a second.

Then my mom was understandably jealous of my fine hats. So I came over to help her decorate one.

Or two.

Or three.

Then I had this other bonnet that looked shabby in comparison, so I had to fancy that up...

And then I realized my husband had no fancy hat! Luckily I had some leftover blue wool twill.

It may take some doing for him to catch up to me at this point. If you give a Jana a hat...

Sassycat!

2009-07-17T22:12:00.002-06:00

EEEEEEEEE! It is a good day at work when you arrive to find a surprise kitten. I have named him/her Sassycat. Sassycat is sassy.

Sassycat sneaking onto the table. Sassy.

Cats, sassy or not, seem to universally love sitting on my lap when I am dressed as a pioneer. It may possibly have something to do with the fact that My Lap + Petticoats + Puffy Skirt + Apron = Big Comfy Pillow.

Sassycat, she/he is cuddly. And sassy.

Mostly just cuddly though.

Playing in the Mud

2009-07-16T16:19:00.002-06:00

I brought Ron with me to work, and since he is an angel, he offered to fix the dugout. Woo! The dirt has eroded and it had a hole by the door big enough for a small bear to get through, which I do not feel would be a historically accurate circumstance. Dugouts being in the ground, he needed some mud. I and the volunteers were happy to help provide some.

Peacock, peahen, peachicks, and cheese

2009-07-11T01:09:00.003-06:00

Lady Hollyhock

2009-07-11T01:01:00.003-06:00



All the names I know from nurse:
Gardener's garters, Shepherd's purse,
Bachelor's buttons, Lady's smock,
And the Lady Hollyhock,

Fairy places, fairy things,
Fairy woods where the wild bee wings,
Tiny trees for tiny dames -
These must all be fairy names!

Tiny woods below whose boughs
Shady fairies weave a house;
Tiny tree-tops, rose or thyme,
Where the braver fairies climb!

Fair are grown-up people's trees,
But the fairest woods are these;
Where if I were not so tall,
I should live for good and all.
Robert Louis Stevenson

Reupholstering MIL's Chairs

2009-07-03T15:35:00.002-06:00

We got MIL some kitchen chairs from freecycle a while ago. Unfortunately they were kind of rickety, with stained upholstery. Yesterday, we solved both these problems!

Old fabric

My man is handy with a glue gun.

New fabric

Happy MIL!

What is that you say? You want more pictures from work? Happy to oblige.

A 10-year old took these two.

Pictures from work II

2009-06-17T22:21:00.006-06:00

We believe in child labor.

See the suffering?

A pioneer lady's HMFYOCYTIAF quotient is: 2.

Pictures from work

2009-06-16T10:32:00.003-06:00

Making Cheese

2009-06-15T13:52:00.004-06:00

Cheese is delicious. Here is how to make some! This kind of cheese does not melt or act like normal cheese, so I like to crumble it up with salt (LOTS of salt) and chives and eat it on crackers. You can also use it as a meat substitute. This is also the kind of cheese Indians call Panir and Mexicans call Queso Blanco. Ron says this is also exactly like Afghan cheese.

1. Heat 1 gallon of milk to 185 F.

Stir constantly, or you will be sad. Milk tends to burn on the bottom, which will make your cheese taste icky. It also forms a skin on top, under which pressure builds until it suddenly boils right over the top of your pot and burns onto your stove. If doing this over a fire, it helps to have a friggin' huge spoon.

2. Take off the heat and add 1/4 C. vinegar or lemon juice. Stir until the curds separate from the whey. The whey will be almost clear. You can throw it away or use it to make breads and things, as the whey has lots of vitamins and whatnot.

3. Pour into a dish towel. Cheesecloth will not work here because the curds are very small, unless you have several layers. If you squeeze it, it will turn into a sliceable ball, as I did. If you just pour it in and then let it hang naturally, it will be like little crumbles. Hang it up to drip dry for a while. At home, I find the faucet over the sink works well for this.

4. Ta da! A cheese! You can either mash it up into crumbles, or refrigerate and slice.

Butter

2009-06-15T13:43:00.006-06:00

As has been mentioned before, I (Jana) work on a living history farm. I have declared once a week to be Dairy Day, and on that day I make cheese and butter.

There are lots of instructions on how to make butter on the internet, but only rarely do they tell how to properly wash the butter. Slackers! Butter takes a few weeks to spoil, but buttermilk only takes days. This is why after pouring off the buttermilk, you must rid the butter of all traces of it lest your butter be Spoiled Milk flavor.

To make butter, you must find some heavy cream, whipping cream, or heavy whipping cream. The differences between these creams is not worth knowing. Whip the cream as if you were making whipped cream (but without sugar and vanilla, please!) and just keep going until you have chunks of butter floating in buttermilk. You can use a KitchenAid with a whisk attachment, shake it in a jar, or buy a butter churn. Whatever fills your heart with gladness, really.

Butter is fat. Water does not mix with fat. Ergo, you must pour in cold water and squish the butter around. The buttermilk will leach from the butter and into the water, which you must then pour off and dispose of. Keep doing that until the water is clear, like this:

Yum. Buttery. When you pour off the last of the water, you can either leave it unsalted for cooking (which in my opinion would be a waste, considering all that work you just did!) or put in about 1 t. salt for every lb. of butter.

Oh yes, and here is a handy tip: When measuring butter when it is not conveniently in stick form, use displacement instead of trying to pack ice-cold butter into a measuring cup. For instance, if you need 1/2 C. butter, fill a liquid measuring cup with 1/2 C. cold water and add globs of butter until it reaches 1 C. Pour off the water and you are ready to go! Easy squeezy!

Feeding Geese

2009-06-15T13:33:00.005-06:00

We found some Canada geese to feed! All of Jana's sisters are severely afraid of geese, because they are scaredy-cats.

Geese like garlic naan.

Tiny Kitty Update

2009-06-08T16:05:00.002-06:00

I realized that my tiny kitty was not finished. After applying this, this, and this, I think it is now!

I must show you the poster full-size, for optimal enjoyment.

Yes. Oh yes.

The Labyrinth (Our super-sweet vacation Pt. III)

2009-06-07T20:15:00.002-06:00

While on our vacation, we had the opportunity to go on a journey of spiritual enlightenment. We were intrigued, and therefore made sure to spend some time there.

How does one walk through a Labyrinth? By dancing a miner's jig, of course.

Jana is pleased that David Bowie does not live at the center of this Labyrinth!

Of course, some of us take Labyrinth walking more seriously than others.

Tiny Kitty!

2009-06-04T19:09:00.003-06:00

Oh my goodness. I saw this and this on here yesterday, and had to make my own! But Jana, you ask. Why? What are you going to do with it? The answer to that is, of course, because it is adorable, and I'm going to look at it and giggle, that's what. Hmph.

This is a modge podged Altoids tin. What is inside? What could it be?

OMGosh a TINY KITTY.

I love, love, love how Miss Kitty's face turned out. I find the eyes goggly and amusing and the tongue silly. The bear is made of that kind of felt that they make all fuzzy (flocked?) , and she has a Little Golden Book entitled Meow for bedtime reading. Shut up you know you are barfing rainbows right now.

Comes with box, kitty, teddy bear, book, skirt, sheet, blankie, and pillow.

For the mattress, I glued batting to a piece of cardboard fitted to the inside of the Altoids box, wrapped it in fabric, and glued that in.

Please note also that kitties have tails, which, granted, probably makes it difficult to wear skirts.

Modge podge: $2.50
Scrapbooking paper: $0.31
Everything else: stuff I found at my house or stole from my mom while she is out of town.
Total cost: $2.81

The Hike (or: Our Super Sweet Vacation Pt. II)

2009-05-29T11:00:00.000-06:00

Jana does not like to hike. Ron hikes all over the Hindu Kush mountains. We compromised by going on the baby hike. Jana almost died it was so hard. Ron practically skipped the whole way.

This is Bill the Guide. Bill is 82. Bill will kick your butt at hiking. One thinks that since he is old, that the hike will be cake. One neglects to notice his bronzed, wiry legs. One is very sorry indeed. With Bill is the Bad Spiky Bush. The Bad Spiky Bush has barbs that will shoot into your flesh and sting like fire, and then continue to burn even when you rip them out. Jana learned this from experience.

I'm gonna be the mane event, like no king was before! I'm brushing up on looking down, I'm working on my ROARRR!

We went through a bunch of slot canyons, which are very narrow indeed.

Green Valley provided us with frozen washcloths. At first they are cold and frozen, and then they are cool and wet. Genius!

There were flowers too.

And silly people.

The Core VIP, or: our Super Sweet Vacation Pt. I)

2009-05-28T13:26:00.003-06:00

Some of you may have noticed the lack of updates. That is mostly because we are lazy, but partly because we just went on vacation! It was fabbity fab fab. Mostly because we found a program called The Core VIP , which is an awesome program in which veterans get to do cool vacation stuff (for free!) with their spouse. It is partly a "thank you!" and partly to help veterans bond with their spouse. Deployment is all kinds of weird for a relationship. Family systems tend towards homeostasis, or they fall apart. Deployment disrupts the system, but a successful family adjusts itself to operate without the deployed spouse. When the spouse returns, it can be difficult to fit them back into the system. Lame!

This is the Green Valley Spa. We got massages here! They, too, were fabbity fab fab.

I swear by my pretty floral bonnet...

2009-05-10T14:44:00.006-06:00

Don't you love it when you set out to make something, and it turns out 100x BETTER than you expected it to? I started out with a regular green wool hat that I found at the thrift store for like $.75. Then I recalled from my Textiles class that, in theory, wool + moisture + heat + pressure = anything you want that wool to look like. So, after I gave up on the hat because it just didn't fit right, I decided to try and make it bonnet shaped. I didn't actually think it would work that well, but I was feeling a lot of bad feelings towards that hat. So I sprayed it with water, set the iron on high heat with steam, and went to town. It actually worked! After cutting out a piece for the neck, I had a bonnet shape! Woo hoo!

Next, I went to the fabric store and got some stuff. "Stuff" included pink (polyester) shantung silk, sage green upholstery braid, 3" wide cream (polyester) double-faced satin ribbon, fabric glue (don't judge me!), 3 mm pink satin ribbon, and lace (the kind you wind ribbon through. Which I did.)

First I put on the braid. I wanted the outside edge to have a nice finished look, which the braid accomplished nicely.

Then I covered the part of the braid that you sew on with lace, with the pink ribbon wound through it. I promise it really is pink, despite the picture.

Then I hemmed the pink silk, gathered it, and glued it to the neck. I used pins for all this to keep what was being glued where it was supposed to be.

Then for the ribbon ties! I got very wide ribbon because 1.) the bow would look fancy 2.) I could fold it and hide the stitches I used to attach it. Unfortunately, I cut the ribbon off too short accidentally, so I had to sew it back together. That is the seam at the top. Oops. I tapered the fold at the bottom and sewed across it so it would stay put nicely.

That was about it, because fake plastic flowers are icky and anachronistic, and this hat is for my work, where I have to dress as if I'm in the 1860's. There were no plastic flowers in the 1860's, especially not ones with fake plastic dew drops. Have you seen those? They are weird. I thought about putting peacock feathers on, but they didn't seem pink enough. Luckily, the internet came through for me, and I got some instructions on how to make fabric flowers from here. Even more lucky, I had some pink silk left, so it would match the back. I covered a button with extra ribbon for the middle. I'm just so happy with how it turned out!

And here is the finished hat!

Woo hoo! Total cost: app. $15.

Hooray for employment!

2009-05-07T16:18:00.006-06:00

Hooray! I, Jana, have achieved employment, and am now working at a living history farm. At this time of the year, we get a lot of schools coming for field trips. Recently we had some 1st graders come. Aren't 1st graders fun? Some of my favorite moments of that day:

Me: This is the root cellar! It's like a secret cave down there. See all the dirt we have piled on the roof? That makes it nice and cold inside. What do you think we put in here that has to be kept nice and cold?
1st grader: ...penguins?
A little brother: *psst! psst!* (he whispers in my ear:) powler beawrs?

1st graders: AHHH! AHHH! That turkey is jumping on the other one! He's being mean! Make him stop, he's hurting her!
Dad: ...He's just giving her a back massage.
1st graders: Oh.

New Apartment! Yay!

2009-04-20T16:42:00.004-06:00

This is our porch. We just planted the plants today, and they look lovely.

Our living room, wherein dwells the Television.

The Kitchen. Things are out at the moment because Jana is making delicious bread.
When it's done, we're going to dip it in olive oil, and eat it. Mmmmmm.

The hallway, which leads to the rest of the rooms.

The Gaming room/library. Complete with window seat.

The Bedroom.

And finally, the bathroom!

It is a fine apartment, and we like it a whole lot. We're especially proud of the washer and dryer we have now. Woo!

Any-Kind-of-Fruit Cake

2009-03-30T20:18:00.002-06:00

Sometimes there are quarts of canned fruit in the back of your pantry that are old and weird, and no one wants to eat them. Sometimes you get tons of free apricots, and you can them, even though canned apricots are slimy and mushy. Sometimes you need tasty cake. For these causes, I give you:

Any-Kind-Of-Fruit Cake
1 quart of fruit
1 C. sugar
1 C. oil
2 eggs
4 C. flour
1 t. salt
4 t. baking soda
Spices that go with the kind of fruit you have used
Add-ins like raisins, nuts, coconut, etc. (optional)

Use fruit that is room temperature. Dump the whole thing, juice and all, into the blender and puree. Put sugar, oil, and eggs into the blender and mix together. In another bowl, combine flour, salt, baking soda, spices, and add-ins. Pour wet ingredients into the dry ingredients and mix together. Bake in a greased 9x13 pan at 350 F. for 40 minutes. Cool and frost.

Or!
Before baking, mix together 1/2 C. sugar, 1 t. cinnamon, and 1/2 C. chopped nuts and sprinkle over the batter.

For this batch, I used apricots, nutmeg, and cream cheese frosting colored a pleasing pink. And it was delicious.

Warrior Muffins

2009-03-21T16:43:00.002-06:00

Meals, Ready to Eat, or "Mr. E's”* as they are sometimes known, are legendary for their ability to slow down the digestive process, sometimes by many days. Luckily, there are delicious Warrior Muffins to speed things up again.   The Warrior Muffin got its name from the "Warrior's Drink” (prune juice) so called by Worf in Star Trek: TNG for its ability to prepare the mighty warrior’s body for battle.

1/2 C. vegetable oil
1 1/2 C. sugar
2 eggs
2 C. buttermilk
2 C. All Bran cereal
2 1/2 C. flour
2 1/2 t. baking soda
1 1/2 t. salt
1 C. boiling water
1 C. Bran Buds cereal

Pour boiling water over Bran Buds and set aside to cool. In another bowl, cream oil, sugar, and add eggs. Beat well. Add buttermilk and All Bran. Mix flour, baking soda, and salt together and add to All Bran mixture. Fold in soaked Bran Buds. Store in covered bowl in refrigerator until ready to bake. Do NOT stir after setting in refrigerator, so it is easy to dip out just the amount needed whenever you want fresh hot muffins. Bake 15 minutes at 400 F. in a greased muffin tin.

*Or "Meals Refusing to Exit"

Cupcakes of Failure

2009-03-18T21:42:00.006-06:00

"We shall have a class party! Everyone bring treats!" my teacher said. "Hooray!" said I. I was excited. I had all these cake mixes, begging to be used. All that frosting. Moreover, I'd just seen a cool decorating hint on realsimple, Use Cookie Cutters to Decorate Cakes! Splendid! Look how nice!

Place cookie cutters on top and fill with sprinkles, powdered sugar, or cocoa powder. (Warning: This technique may convince guests you've taken a master class in cake decorating.)

Perfect! I shall fill each cupcake with plum jam and make lovely flowers on top with my cookie cutter, with happy lemon yellow chips for centers! It will be adorably precious! All will be amazed at my skills!

I made one batch. There didn't seem to be enough. So I made another batch. 36 cupcakes. Each one painstakingly and tediously filled with jam and lovingly frosted. The result?

Sea creatures from the part of the sea that scuba divers do not want to go. The squidgy parts.

Why do you lie to me, Internet?

Internet, I am throwing away our friendship bracelet.

The Ides of March

2009-03-15T19:58:00.004-06:00

In Roman times, the Ides of March marked a celebration in honor of Mars, God of war. Although we do not ourselves worship Mars, we do enjoy celebrating obscure holidays.
It is also the 2,057th anniversary of the tyrannicide of Julius Caesar. Sadly, Tyrannicide means to kill a tyrant, and not to kill a tyrannosaurus rex.

Besides, Jana had a turkey she bought on sale last Thanksgiving, and just could not eat it all by her lonesome.

Look at that spread. Delicious.

Our Thunder Lizard deserves a close-up.

Please do not judge us by our leftovers. We're growing young adults.

Happy Pi Day everybody!

2009-03-14T14:26:00.003-06:00

The Grand Tour

2009-03-10T19:00:00.012-06:00

We recently visited all the kinfolk, so as to distribute presents and show off Jana's fancy Bhurqa and Afghan dresses. Here are some fine pictures. Click to embiggen!

Jana's wonderful grandparents, and a lovely meal they made for us.

Yorkshire pudding is awesome. Mmmmmmmmmm.

And so we kissed....

2009-02-27T10:34:00.006-07:00

Like this:

Pictures!

2009-02-22T17:43:00.006-07:00

Being once more in the land of the internet, I have uploaded many, many pictures to the web. They include pictures from Afghanistan, our wedding, and a few pictures of Jana and myself.
Hope you enjoy.

http://picasaweb.google.com/ronandjana

Cooking With Kelsey Nixon II

2009-02-22T00:01:00.004-07:00

Like the best Sacrament ever...

I was going to type the recipes up from the hand-out, but then I realized they were all on Kelsey's website. So I'll just list them.

*Roasted Mediterranean Salmon: Apparently Aaron from the show used this recipe of hers on his show recently. Sadly, I didn't get to try any. Poor salmon-starved Jana. :'(
*Garden Chowder: I liked this one, and I don't like zucchini or tomatoes. I do like things covered in cheesy sauce though, which may have something to do with it. This recipe was developed for Zupa's, and appeared on their menu last month.
*Toasted Herb Pita Bread: Tasty times.
*Curried Coconut Chicken: She didn't make these, but the recipe is on the website.
*Chile Chicken Enchiladas: Ditto.

Update!: Apparently I lied, and they are not all on her website. Rats!

Garden Chowder
3 T. butter
2 medium zucchini, diced
1 medium onion, diced
2 T. dried parsley
2 T. dried basil
1/3 C. flour
3 C. chicken broth
1 t. lemon juice
2-3 tomatoes, diced
1 can (12 oz.) evaporated milk
1 can corn
1/3 C. Parmesan cheese, grated
2 C. cheddar cheese, shredded
1 t. kosher salt
1 t. freshly ground pepper

Directions:
Over medium heat, saute the zucchini, onion, parsley, and basil in butter until vegetables are tender. Add flour, stir until vegetables are coated. Slowly add chicken broth and lemon juice. Bring to a boil. Add tomatoes, milk, and corn. Reduce heat; cover and simmer for five minutes or until corn is tender. Just before serving, stir in cheeses until melted. Season with salt and pepper.

Toasted Herb Pita Bread
2 round pita bread, cut into 8 wedges
extra virgin olive oil
Italian seasoning, kosher salt, and freshly ground pepper
1/4 C. asiago cheese, shredded

Directions:
Preheat oven to 375F. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper. Arrange pita wedges on prepared baking sheet, drizzle with enough olive oil to coat each wedge. Sprinkle with seasoning and cheese. Bake until wedges are crisp and cheese is golde, 10-15 minutes.

Curried Coconut Chicken
2 pounds boneless skinless chicken breasts, cut into 1/2" chunks
1 t. salt and pepper
1 1/2 T. vegetable oil
2 T. curry powder
1/2 onion, thinly sliced
1/2 green bell pepper, sliced
2 cloves garlic, crushed
1 (14 oz.) can coconut milk
1 (14.5 oz.) can stewed, diced tomatoes
1 (8 oz.) can tomato sauce
3 T. brown sugar

Directions:
Season chicken pieces with salt and pepper. Heat oil and curry powder in a large skillet over medium-high heat for two minutes (toast the spices for more flavor). Stir in onions, peppers, and garlic, and cook a minute more. Add chicken, tossing lightly to coat with curry oil. Reduce heat to medium, and cook for 7 to 10 minutes, or until chicken is no longer pink in center and juices run clear. Pour coconut milk, tomatoes, tomato sauce, and sugar into the pan, and stir to combine. Cover and simmer, stirring occasionally, approximately 20-30 minutes. Serve over jasmine rice and garnish with chopped peanuts and cilantro.

Cooking With Kelsey Nixon

2009-02-21T13:13:00.003-07:00

You guys! I had the opportunity to go to a cooking demonstration given by Kelsey Nixon, who you may remember from The Next Food Network Star. She is a real sweetheart, and as cute as can be. I am even sadder now than I was when the show ended that she did not get her own show. Sigh! She is very practical, which I would love to see in a cooking show. However, she's got some other projects going now that sound really fun. Que sera!

The thing I liked most was that Kelsey quoted how much things actually cost, and how you could use less-expensive alternatives with good results. Sometimes the folks on Food Network can get snippy about that sort of thing. I also liked how her recipes are ones that you can make every day on a budget, not ones you would only make if you were feeling extra industrious and also wanted to go buy 10 ingredients. She also mentioned couponing and food storage. My kind of gal! In my next post I will share the recipes with all you darling readers, some of which I got to taste test! But for now, I will leave you with this image of the room we were in.

Coming Home!

2009-02-19T17:06:00.002-07:00

Good news! Ron is back in the USA! But not back home yet for several more days. Boo! Hiss!

A farewell to facial appendages

2009-02-14T08:48:00.008-07:00

There are few constants on a deployment. I was lucky, however, to have a companion that was always with me.

Through Thick...

and thin.

While out in the countrysideAnd home on the FOB.

Contrary to popular belief, hair has many uses:

It works as a handy wind gauge

Allows you to blend in with local nationals

is a readily available storage unit

and keeps you warm, when even a wall of stacked rocks cannot block the wind.

A fine young man who agreed to cut my hair for me.
Sadly, he suffered from a temporary brain malfunction, and confused my phrase of: "Leave about an inch on top" with: "Leave about a centimeter on top." Alas.

Let it rest in peace.

I must admit though, I do look pretty good without it.

Profanity and Kittens

2009-02-10T14:41:00.004-07:00

Ladies, gentlemen, I do not like swearing. However, this being a free country, people have a right to say as many naughty words as they like on the internet.

Solution! With this Firefox add-on, I can change naughty words into whatever word I like. Right now, that word is "kitten." This turns out many a delightful sentence. Try it today! Your enjoyment of the websites of angry, deep teenagers will be greatly enhanced, I promise you.

Silly Questions

2009-02-08T21:03:00.006-07:00

Best silly question ever. It went like this:

Single Friend: Wow, your husband is getting back so soon! What are you going to do with him when he gets back?

Some questions do not require answers, just a long, sufficiently expressive look.

That's right! We're going to MAKE OUT.

Alternate picture #1
Alternate picture #2

Care Package Favorites: Hickory Farms

2009-01-25T16:51:00.003-07:00

Attention military types! Hickory Farms has a selection of products that they will ship free to any APO/FPO address, to include sausage, cheese, and cookies. Boys like those sorts of things, in my experience. So if you are looking for an easy-squeezy care package that will bring joy to the heart of a soldier, this is the idea for you!

If you are not a military type, think how much more appreciative soldiers would be than they would be of yellow ribbon car decals! Consider showing your support in the form of meat.

Yorkshire Pudding

2009-01-21T00:01:00.001-07:00

Yorkshire pudding. Oh my goodness Yorkshire pudding. This is what popovers wish they could be. The pudding is soaked with meat juice, and the meat has a thin crust of pudding on it that tastes like bacon.

Yorkshire Pudding
A roast (standing rib roasts work the best, but you do what you have to do.)
4 eggs
3 C. milk
1 1/2 t. salt
2 C. flour

Partially cook roast in a large dripper pan. Beat eggs well with hand mixer. Add other ingredients and pour over roast. Bake 10 minutes at 400 F. then 50 min. at 350 F. Remove and slice the roast, then cut the pudding into wedges. Serve with beef broth (stronger than usual, add more beef bouillon) in little cups to dip beef and pudding into, or just pour the broth over everything.

Baklava

2009-01-19T00:01:00.002-07:00

There is something really satisfying about the texture of the layers of phyllo dough in baklava. I went non-traditional this year and made it for Christmas dinner dessert. Tasty!

Baklava
1/2 lb. walnuts, chopped finely
½ tbsp. sugar
1/2 tsp. cinnamon
½ c. melted butter
1/2 lb. phyllo sheets (you will fold each sheet over, alternating so you don't get one really tall side and one really short side)
1/2 c. water
1 stick cinnamon
2 Tbsp. honey
20 whole cloves (optional)

1. Combine walnuts, 1/2 tablespoon sugar and cinnamon in mixing bowl.
2. Brush bottom of 9 by 9-inch pan with butter.
3. Place 1/2 phyllo sheet over butter; butter the sheet. Repeat process for 8 layers.
4. Place ½ the walnut mixture over eighth buttered sheet. Cover with 2 more buttered sheets; top with remaining walnut mixture. Repeat layers of phyllo sheets and butter until all sheets are used.
5. Cut in diamond shapes and place a whole clove into the center of each diamond. Bake at 350 degrees for 30 minutes. Reduce temperature to 300 degrees; bake for 30 minutes longer.

Syrup:
6. Boil 1 cup sugar, water and cinnamon stick to a thin syrup. Stir in honey. Cool. Pour syrup over hot pastry. Cool before serving.

Important note about phyllo dough:
When using phyllo, you need to keep it in a moist, yet not wet, environment so it doesn't dry out. So get a kitchen towel wet, wring all the water out you can, then put it on the counter. Top it with two sheets of wax paper or plastic wrap, and then another wrung out towel on top. Keep your phyllo in between the wax paper or plastic wrap layers and keep it covered when you are busy brushing with butter and whatnot. You can find phyllo in the frozen foods section. Wal-mart carries it, for some reason.

Cheese, glorious cheese!

2009-01-17T14:48:00.007-07:00

We love cheese. Grilled cheese sandwiches, cheese toast, cheesey cream soups, macaroni and cheese, cheese baked on top of casseroles so it is crispy.... Mmmmmmmm. Unfortunately, cheese can be expensive. This is why we have this method.

1. Go to the Gossner's cheese factory in Logan, UT. If you don't live close enough, check and see if you have a cheese factory near you! You never know. Buy lots of the weird shaped end pieces. They are the cheapest. I think I bought about 17 lbs. of cheese. I got mostly medium cheddar and monterey jack for $2.57/lb., with some sharp cheddar at $3.10 for cream soups and macaroni and cheese.

2. Skin the cheeses. They stick together better that way, so you can build a Great Wall of Cheese and imagine what it would be like to dance gleefully on such a wall.

3. Chop the cheese into large chunks about the size of the cheddar shown below so you can feed it into your KitchenAid. You aren't going to use a hand grater, are you? Foolish!

4. Grate. Aren't you glad you aren't using a hand grater?

5. Fill sandwich bags with cheese and freeze. One sandwich bag is about perfect for topping casseroles and most other things I need cheese for. Gaze into the freezer and sigh in joy at your wealth of cheese.

Vote!

2009-01-16T20:44:00.000-07:00

There's a new poll on the side. Vote in it!

The Sun will come out, Tomorrow!

2009-01-16T08:26:00.014-07:00

As it's been very rainy recently, we've also had some supermegacool clouds. Supermegacool clouds mean awesome pictures.
Especially when taken with the wonderful camera Jana sent me when my old one broke.

In Russian, there is a word:
Достопримечателность
It means, literally, a place you can make note of, even after seeing it a hundred times.
(It's pronounced: Do-sto-pre-mye-chat-yel-nost)
My little corner of the Hindu Kush is such a place.

The pictures are desktop sized for your convenience.